Poison
by sh-sh-shota
Summary: SebaCiel tragedy and fluff, I hope you all enjoy !


Rain poured down from the darkened sky, crashing against the cobblestone streets with no mercy. Streaks of lightening flashed, the temporary light pouring down through windows of dimmed homes, teasing them with the momentary brightness with each strike. The grumbling of thunder rattled windows, it's low growl a warning for another flash of lightening to strike at any moment. As temperatures dropped day by day in London, this was likely to be the last rain before water froze into soft snowflakes, signifying the beginning of winter.

Ciel remained where he had been all day - sat in a large leather office chair, sifting through various papers containing bills, pleads for loans, questionable business offers, etc, etc, etc.

Tedious.  
It was all so tedious.

A bolt of lightening flashed, illuminating the dimmed office for only a moment before slowly fading away, leaving no trace of it's presence. The young earl's small frame shook from the flash, his heartbeat automatically picking up it's pace. Not too late afterwards, a deafening roar of thunder caused the muscle's consistent rhythm to pick up, pounding at the boy's chest with such force, it nearly ripped through the bone and tissue keeping it contained.

Tha-thump.  
Tha-thump.  
Tha-thump.

Frail hands trembled, unable to lift another envelope as his muscles weakened in fear. A strong, unforgiving wind pelted an unimaginable amount of rain against the Phantomhive Manor windows. Anxiety flooded his veins, hazing his mind with panicked thoughts.  
Down in the main hallway sat a large wooden grandfather clock, sitting silently, considering it's soft ticking was drowned out by the seemingly endless rain and deafening thunder.  
However, once the hand struck midnight, it's thunderous sound broke through the storm, echoing off of the estate's walls.

Sebastian's ears twitched ever so slightly, the continuous ringing signified the arrival of midnight.  
"Ah~" The butler spoke in a soft, calm tone. He set down the damp plate he held in both gloved hands, unrolling his sleeves.  
"It's time for the Young Master to retire~"  
Sebastian spoke to himself, dress shoes clicking against the tiled floor, grabbing the long ebony tailcoat that hung on a coat rack as he walked through the kitchen door and into the corridor.  
He paid no mind to the storm that raged on and on, for he had never truly come to the conclusion that the Earl of Phantomhive could be afraid of something as childish as a thunderstorm.  
Before reaching the earl's office, Sebastian attained a candelabra that had been waiting for him patiently atop a small oaken side table that sit just outside the kitchen door.  
With a snap of his gloved fingers, the three waxen candles sparked to life, illuminating the pitch black hallways with the occasional flash of lightening momentarily brightening the estate, only to fade away into the darkness.

Upon approaching the office, Sebastian gently rapped upon the large oaken door, patiently waiting for permission to enter the room. By this point, Ciel remained in the large leather chair, head in hands with frail fingers digging into his small body jolted, almost mistaking the knocking for thunder. He sat up straight, pushing his fear and anxiety down, down, down into the bottom of his heart. "C-" he stopped, his voice hoarse and uneven. With a small sigh and the clearing of his throat, he spoke once more. Louder, Clearer. "Come in, Sebastian".

With a smirk pulling at pale lips and candelabra in hand, the butler calmly opened the oaken door, the only sound filling the room was the soft creak of the door hinges. "Young Master, it's time for you to retire~" his voice, smooth as silk, sent an odd wave of comfort to crash over Ciel's bluenette slowly stood, his knees originally trembling slightly, eventually steadying out after a few steps. 'How childish.' he couldn't help but think, a low grumble of thunder setting his heart off-beat. The two were silent as they exited the study, the large wooden door closing behind them. Sebastian walked behind the boy, his auburn gaze fixed onto the being before him. A thin eyebrow raised when a flash of lightening struck, causing a plague of goosebumps to cover the young earl's milky skin. He paid it no mind, brushing it off as an effect of the dropping temperatures.

Ciel walked into his chambers through the already open doorway, sitting on the edge of the bed silently. Cerulean locks of hair fell before his face, hiding bicolored eyes that squeezed tightly shut. Suddenly, an especially loud - almost deafening - roar of thunder shook the estate's windows, a heavy wave of rain pelting against the glass as well. His weak heart raced at such a speed, the muscle threatened to break through the bone and tissue that kept it within Ciel's such heightened hearing, the consistent, quick beats of the boy's heart pounded against Sebastian's eardrums.  
Was he...  
Afraid..?

The demon's memory played back to the day he had formed a contract with Ciel. It was a night just like tonight. A violent storm raged on outside the newly built estate walls, the cold temperatures chilling the injured boy to the bone. He was so frightened...terrified, really. Sebastian had never realized it was the storm that had set the boy off all those years ago. It seemed more logical that a demon's presence would be what made his heart race, that made goosebumps spread across milky, bruised skin like a plague. But, with the earl's current state, it was quite clear that the poor weather is his master's one true weakness.  
What was it that calmed him down all those years ago? It seemed to be such an insignificant detail to him back then, he never really bothered to remember it.  
Hot chocolate?..  
No, no. It was warm...warm milk?  
Ah, yes. Warm milk and honey, how could he forget?

Sebastian walked to the large oaken dresser, pulling out an ivory nightshirt from the top drawer, draping it over his arm. The butler walked back to the bedside, setting down the shirt onto the large duvet that covered the pillow-top mattress. Gloved fingers worked quickly, skillfully popping open each silken button of the boy's dress shirt, exposing the thin, slightly toned torso that lay underneath. "Would you like me to make you some warm milk and honey, My Lord? It's rather cold tonight~" He spoke smoothly, peeling off the boy's clothes bit by bit, until there was nothing left but his undergarments - but he left those just as they were.

Bicolored eyes opened ever so slightly, his head raising itself just enough to meet the auburn gaze before him. "Milk and honey...?" his soft words slipped out slowly through pastel lips, hanging in the air around them. That was what his parents would...  
An emotional dagger stabbed right through his heart, causing frail fingers to grip tightly at the duvet beneath him.  
Don't linger in the past.  
Don't feel.  
Emotions are weak, you can't be weak.

"Ah. Yes, that sounds nice.." He spoke softly, slowly. Despite the fact he wanted to come off as strong, unbreakable, he couldn't hide that hint of anxiety that rest in his throat. Of course, Sebastian noticed this, however he kept silent about it. It was unfit for a butler to question his master's personal thoughts and feelings. And on top of that, how could a demon help? He's a monster.  
Repulsive.  
Disgusting.  
And this reminder made the smile fade from thin lips ever so slightly. He can't help, only destroy. So for Ciel's sake, it's best if he just kept his mouth shut.

The boy lifted a frail arm, Sebastian sliding it through a sleeve of the cotton nightshirt, repeating the action for the other limb. Quickly and with precision, he weaved each silk button into the appropriate hole, leaving the top two undone. The oversized shirt spilled over Ciel's small frame, consuming him in the ocean of cloth. Auburn eyes were momentarily locked on the boy's frail hands, noticing even the slightest movement.  
He's trembling...  
Sebastian blinked once, then twice. His mind wandering off into a sea of questions and possibilities.  
Could he help?  
Should he say something?  
No, no.  
It isn't his place.

The butler stood, a faint smile pulling at pale lips. He took a bow, a gloved hand placed over his non-beating heart. "I shall go make your drink, My Lord." Sebastian spoke before dismissing himself, silently closing the heavy door behind him. Ciel remained where he was; sat on the edge of the bed, frail legs dangling over the side. It seemed as if the moment Sebastian left, the storm outside intensified, thunder roaring, lightening flashing at a seemingly constant pace. His heartbeat increased to an impossible speed, knocking at his chest over and over again. the frightened boy curled up within himself on the bed, frail fingers digging into his skull.

His mind automatically went back to when he was younger and his mother and father would comfort him during storms. While Vincent would excuse himself to make the warm drink of warm milk and honey, Rachel would sing the same song over and over again.  
Would it still work...?  
But..now, there was noone to sing to him.  
He's all alone.  
The tune begun in his throat, humming softly. As the storm became more violent, the lyrics reluctantly slipped past pale lips. Despite his scared, trembling voice, the words still brought the slightest bit of comfort.

_"No matter where you are...  
__It is never too far...  
__If you think of me,  
__I will be with you...  
__No matter where..."_

His voice faded away, transparent tears slipping down milky skin, collecting on the duvet beneath him. His small body curled up more, as if he could hide from the world. Hide from his mind and the painful memories it brought to him. The song wouldn't stop in his mind, over and over again, but in his mother's voice...

Please.  
Leave me alone..  
You're gone..  
Leave my mind alone...  
You're killing me...  
Mother...  
Father...

These poisonous thoughts drowned everything out. The rain, the thunder, his breaths, even the oaken door that opened with a loud creak as Sebastian entered the room. He didn't hear a bit of it.  
Auburn eyes widened, the butler's gaze frozen on Ciel, curled up and whimpering softly.  
He was...crying?

"Young Master...?


End file.
